Emotional intelligence (EI) is most often defined as the ability to perceive, use, understand, manage, and handle emotions. People with high emotional intelligence can recognize their own emotions and those of others, use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior, discern between different feelings and label them appropriately, and adjust emotions to adapt to environments.

What Self-awareness Really Is (And How To Cultivate It) Southlake TX

Published Apr 10, 22
4 min read

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In our interviews, we discovered that people who improved their external self-awareness did so by seeking out feedback from caring critics that is, individuals who have their best interests in mind and are willing to tell them the truth. To ensure they don't overreact or overcorrect based on one person's viewpoint, they likewise gut-check challenging or unexpected feedback with others.

What better way to understand ourselves than by reflecting on why we are the method we are? Yet among the most unexpected findings of our research study is that individuals who introspect are less self-aware and report even worse job complete satisfaction and wellness. Other research study has actually shown similar patterns.

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To understand this, let's take a look at probably the most typical reflective question: "Why?" We ask this when trying to understand our emotions (Why do I like worker A so much more than staff member B?), or our behavior (Why did I fly off the handle with that staff member?), or our mindsets (Why am I so against this deal?).

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As it turns out, "why" is a remarkably ineffective self-awareness concern. Research has revealed that we simply do not have access to much of the unconscious ideas, feelings, and intentions we're browsing for. And due to the fact that so much is trapped outside of our conscious awareness, we tend to develop responses that feel true but are frequently wrong.

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The problem with asking why isn't just how wrong we are, but how positive we are that we are right. The human mind hardly ever runs in a reasonable fashion, and our judgments are seldom totally free from predisposition. We tend to catch whatever "insights" we find without questioning their validity or worth, we overlook inconsistent proof, and we force our thoughts to conform to our preliminary descriptions.

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In our research study, we've found that people who are very reflective are likewise most likely to get captured in ruminative patterns. For example, if a worker who receives a bad performance evaluation asks Why did I get such a bad score?, they're likely to land on an explanation concentrated on their worries, drawbacks, or insecurities, rather than a reasonable assessment of their strengths and weak points.

There was a clear pattern: Although the word "why" appeared fewer than 150 times, the word "what" appeared more than 1,000 times. For that reason, to increase productive self-insight and reduce unproductive rumination, we must ask what, not why. "What" concerns help us remain unbiased, future-focused, and empowered to act upon our new insights.

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Instead of asking "Why did you state this about me?," Robin inquired, "What are the actions I need to take in the future to do a much better job?" This assisted them move to services instead of focusing on the unproductive patterns of the past. Self-awareness isn't one fact. It's a delicate balance of 2 distinct, even competing, viewpoints.

Initially, all he could ask himself was "Why wasn't I able to turn things around?" But he quickly recognized that he didn't have the time or energy to beat himself up he had to find out what to do next. He began asking, "What do I need to do to progress in such a way that reduces the impact to our clients and workers?" He created a strategy, and had the ability to discover creative methods to do as much great for others as possible while winding down the company.

These qualitative findings have been reinforced by others' quantitative research. In one research study, psychologists J. Gregory Hixon and William Swann provided a group of undergrads negative feedback on a test of their "sociability, likability and interestingness." Some were given time to consider why they were the kind of person they were, while others were asked to consider what kind of individual they were.

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Hixon and Swann's rather strong conclusion was that "Thinking of why one is the way one is may be no much better than not believing about one's self at all." All of this brings us to conclude: Leaders who focus on structure both internal and external self-awareness, who seek truthful feedback from loving critics, and who ask what instead of why can find out to see themselves more plainly and gain the many rewards that increased self-knowledge delivers.

That is among the important things that makes the journey to self-awareness so amazing.